Its half term and one of those rainy days when being in the house just won't cut it with the girls today. So I take a deep breath and I take them to SOFT PLAY!
The very word causes the hair on my skin to sit up and the flashing red warning lights of total dread to go off in the brain. I can even hear that annoying sound - no not the kids screaming Mum! Mum! MuuuuuuMmm. The police siren. Yes you know the one. Stop
Just listen.... can you hear it now?
If so : good. Then you know exactly my state of mind at that moment.
If not: just stick with me, you'll get there.
So we arrive. Its kids, kids, kids, screaming everywhere. And the bright lights and super bright colours just compound the entire view. The stench of sweat and body odour (that's the parents, kids under 8 don't have body odour) shoot into my nostrils. Its a long walk to the till.
You see for those of you who have never experienced the soft play environment, you have to pay for your sprogs to enter the screaming zone. Yes they actually make you pay to torment yourself. Slightly masochistic but that's the world we live in.
The till is looming. Its a long line so am waiting for the torture to really begin. At least they give you time to mentally prepare yourself.
. I'm so charged up by the time I actually get to the till, it almost didn't register that we missed the last session time and would therefore have to wait. I almost jumped up and hugged the girl (well she barely looks 18 so to me she is a 'girl').This is it! My opportunity to grab my girls and run back home. And then something happened. She started crying (not the till girl), my little baby girl. And then it hit me. While I was feeling sweaty palms, head buzzing cloudy dread at the thought of coming here. My little baby's head was buzzing with butterflies and fairies at the thought of coming here. How could I disappoint her now. And to those tiger parents reading this - NO this was NOT the time teach my daughter the lesson of disappointment. She can learn that another day.
So we went for a walk. I got a book and we went back in time for me to face my SOFTPLAYPHOBIA
Two happy but tired children and one happy and smug Mum (who ended up rewarding herself with a little item from her favourite shop
) went home on the bus, in the drizzly rain thankful for 'SOFT PLAY'.
