Crafty Cork Coasters

Crafty Cork Coasters

Ever wondered what to do with those wine corks after the Xmas period. There are so many things we throw away but this should not be one.

Why not spend a few peaceful moments winding down after the hectic Xmas period crafting. This is a simple craft and will add something you made to your home.

Tools
1 Glue Gun (because it's fun to use!)
10 Wine corks
Card paper (for backing)             
1 kitchen knife

Crafty Cork Coasters by Justamumja.blogspot.com

Happy Crafting All! 

Kimchi (The Cheat's Way)

Kimchi (The Cheat's Way)

Love Kimchi but can't be bothered to buy the marinated cabbage or marinate yourself then use this cheat's guide.

Feeds 4 people

Incredients
2 bags pre-mixed stir-fry vegetables
4-5 tablespoons of kimchi sauce
4/5 tablespoons of soy sauce or tamari sauce (for gluten free version)
2 tablespoons sesame oil
2 cups of basmati rice
4 medium eggs

Method
Cook the rice according to instructions on the packet. General rule for basmati rice is 1 cup of water to 1 cup of rice. Tip: if you cover the pan with a lid or foil (if no lid available) and cook on a low heat for between 15-20 mins, you will get fluffy basmati rice.

Heat a wok with the sesame oil and add pre-mixed stir fry veg. Fry this for 15 mins on medium heat.
Next add 4-5 tablespoons (2-3 tbp if you don't like spice) of the kimchi sauce and stir in to the veg.

While this is cooking, start frying your eggs in a small to medium pan. Leave until the yolk is firm.

Add in the cooked rice to the vegetables in the wok. Then add in the soy/tamari sauce and stir through thoroughly.

Serve hot with the fried egg on top.

Kimchi the Cheat's Way 

Kimchi Sauce 

Enjoy!!

5 Vegan/Vegetarian Wines in Sainsbury's Local and Tesco Express

I used to think that all wine was Vegan. So it rather took me by surprise to learn that the refining process for wine involves the use of fining agents such as casein (a milk protein), albumin (egg whites), gelatin (animal protein) and isinglass (fish bladder protein).

What!!!! are you screaming too!!! 😮

Yes that's right. Wine is not just grapes folks! Although these items are not added to the wine, the fining process means that some allergenic substances may be found in wine. Therefore there are now labels on some wines to indicate those that are safe to consume for people with allergies.

It can be a pain reading all the labels to see if food is safe for you. But if you have allergies you have little choice. Imagine all the strange looks when seen turning every single wine bottle around just to look for the safe symbol.

So figuring I am not alone in this and to save myself future 'weird' looks. I put together a little infographic that will help when in a local supermarket local/express store that I'd like share with you.

Now for a nice glass of Vegan wine 
Enjoy folks!!!

Going Veggie Cheat Sheet!

Going Veggie Cheat Sheet!


We started our vegetarian journey as a family in summer or 2017 and a few things have stuck (like my family's attitude to eating), a few things have fallen by the way side (mostly ingredients like kale, my family hate it but I love it!) and a few habits have developed.

Today I would like to share what habits we have developed in our vegetarian lifestyle.

1. Limit the chopping and buy ready chopped
The first habit was dealing with all that chopping. I started to hate chopping. I mean after the 10th ingredient for this one meal my hands started to rebel and so did my head. The thing is, freshly chopped items in the fridge section of the supermarket are really expensive when your feeding four kids. Four growing kids, 3 of whom are teenagers!!! But there is an alternative... Frozen chopped food. Yes I said it. Frozen!!!

Many supermarkets now stock something they call frozen micro veg. My life saver. No more chopping. Well not so much chopping. It is already chopped normal veg and because it's frozen as soon as possible it still has all the nutrients if not more in some cases as the fresh veg in the food aisle. And the best bit is that you can get a 600g-750g bag of micro veg for under £2. 1 600g-750g bag paired with rice, pasta or potatoes is enough to make a good dinner for a family with four growing kids. Remember people it is just veg. You don't have to microwave it like it says on the package. It can be prepared as part of whatever dish you are making. Roast it, Fry it, Boil it or Saute it and it will still taste good. 

2. Add flavour whenever you can
As a former meat eater I would always flavour my meat with seasonings or herbs before cooking but would not do the same to the vegetables I cooked as part of the meal. I think that was because of the idea that the Meat was the main part of the meal so that had to taste good whereas anything that accompanied the meat could be mediocre and no-one would notice so as the cook I didn't have to care about the 'side dishes'. As a vegetarian, the vegetables are the main feature of the meal so why not apply the same idea to the vegetables and make sure they have flavour. So I now season my vegetables in the same way as I used to season my meat and bwoy what a difference a herb makes. 😊


3. Try different table sauces and dressings
Bbq sauce and Ketchup might be a favourite but they can really numb your palette and your kids palette over time. There are so many options available that make vegetarians dishes simply Pop. So one of the habits we have developed is putting different sauces on the table for everyone to try that would accompany the meal. For example when we are having a red onion and goats cheese quiche, caramelised red onion chutney will be on the table. Sweet potato fries will have aioli on the table for dipping. Pakora or Onion Bajis might have mango chutney or tamarind sauce for dipping. We have found that the sauce like the seasoning can tie a dish together


Hope you have enjoyed reading my cheating tips. Would love to hear yours. Please comment below.

Happy Veggie eating!!!

Stuffed Curried Pearl Barley and Chickpea
Butternut Squash with herb flavoured couscous

 

Quick Homemade Goats cheese, Red Onion and Mushroom Pastries

And so we have gotten over the start of the new school term in September, survived the October Half term holidays, Fireworks night & Guy Fawkes celebrations  (a British tradition) and are now approaching the Christmas holidays, all while remaining mostly vegetarian!

This is such a massive achievement considering our foray into vegetarianism only started as an experiment that was supposed to last 2 weeks!

Of course it would have been so easy to revert back but surprisingly the majority of my family members including myself have stuck to the vegetarian diet while only two of them have had an occasional chicken dish. I could blame the schools and the establishments that they go to but actually that is not the case. Think about it ...years ago it would have been much more difficult to maintain a vegetarian/vegan diet as a school child having school dinners because a) the school probably would not cater a hot meal for you and b) no child wants to be seen as different.

Thankfully things have moved on. So much so in fact that it's kind of seen as cool to have some kind of dietary requirement or another. Well this is more the view amongst middle class primary age school children. But it means that at least you can ask the school not to include dairy in your child's meals without being snared at or worried that your kids will get singled out in a negative way by the other kids. 🙌. If you find out who does the catering in your school, it is pretty easy to speak to the catering manager if your child has special requirements and you don't want to go down the pack lunch route. Catering managers are usually very helpful if you ask nicely.  More managers and catering staff are not only aware of foods nutritional value but they are also more aware of  allergies such as nuts, dairy and shellfish and are trained to handle food in ways that ensure our children's safety😊. Of course if you do not feel this is happening in your school, SPEAK OUT! Believe it or not teachers want parents to be more involved with school life.

And on those days when its not school...
here is a quick easy veggie at-home hot lunch that the kids will love too

Homemade - Goats Cheese, Red Onion and Mushroom Pastries 
with 'Cheats' Caramelised Red Onion Chutney in Jar for topping

Quick Homemade Goats cheese, Red Onion and Mushroom Pastries

Makes 6 portions

Ingredients:
1 Ready to Roll Puff Pastry (375g)
11/2 cups of Mushrooms - Any type
1 tsp pre-crushed garlic
1 Red Onion
1 bag of spinach - 200g
200g of cherry tomatoes
100g of Goats Cheese (Optional)

To Serve:
Caramelised Red Onion Chutney for topping
Rocket Leaves

Method:
Saute the red onion, mushrooms and garlic in a pan on medium heat for 10 mins or until onions are soft and the mushrooms are soft and brown.

While this is cooking, cut out pastry squares from your ready to roll sheet. Pinch the edges of each square. Then place a portion of the cooked mixture into each pastry square. Sprinkle on the goats cheese (optional)

Put into the oven at 200°/180°(Fan Ovens) for 15 minutes or until the pastry is golden brown.

Serve immediately topped with caramelised red onion chutney and rocket leaves.

Enjoy!!!

Growing your own food in London

There seems to be a trend happening in London town and other cities around Britain for growing your own food. I have arrived a little bit late to this but I wanted to share my experience of starting out growing some your own food if you live in the city with  not much outside space.

We don't have huge back garden and I definitely don't have the desire to apply to a waiting list for veg plots on an allotment (as community minded as that is, its just not my thing). For me the odds of tending to a small patch in front of my kitchen were much higher than dragging myself and the kids in the rain to the allotment 😏. So under those circumstances we decided to try to grow 'up' and so opted for a vertical vegetable garden.


Sounds simple right. Well it could have been if I had bought one of these.- Plastic Wall Planter

Plastic Wall Planter 

 However, wanting a more natural looking solution so we opted to build one using pallets. Yes that's right! Pallets are made of very sturdy wood and are a great solution for lots of DIY projects. And buoy did we luck out with our pallets! We got all the material free from a local builders merchants 👍👏. They recycle the pallets there and were very happy to have a few (8 in all ) to be taken off their hands.

So with pallets in hand (well in 2 hands at a time!😜 ), the journey to start a vertical vegetable garden began.

A few DIY cuts and nails later plus some landscaping fabric to line the areas chosen as boxes- the vegetable garden has started!
This frame took nearly 2 days to make from start to finish. 2 Pallets were nailed together to create the 2 bottom sections of the frame. Some of the slats at the front of the doubled pallets were then cut to create some growing space for larger veg. When it came to planting, YouTube instructions suggested lining the back, sides and bottom section of your pallet and then stuffing with your chosen soil/compost mix. However, we decided to create these fabric boxes as the inches between the slats on these pallets did not seem small enough to ensure that the soil would hold in enough moisture without some kind of guarding. This kind of landscaping fabric which we found in our local DIY shop is strong enough to hold the soil, very flexible and at the same time permeable. It is made of a type of plastic but has the look of a burlap fabric with very tiny overlapping squares and looked very similar to some bags used to grow potatoes. The size of the space was measured and the fabric boxes created to fit the space. An overhang was left on each fabric box so that it could be easily stabled to the wood. This created a more sturdy box for the soil to be kept. The whole idea behind using this kind of landscaping fabric is that it will keep the moisture in that is needed, yet allow any roots to grow without being suffocated. For extra stability, extra slats of wood could be fitted under each box area.

Hopefully this time next summer, it will be burgeoning with lots of Yummy vegetables! Watch this space!!

Let me know if you have tried this and your experiences.

From a fledgling gardener just a mum looking to learn more....

See you soon!!

A taste of vegan/vegetarian living

Over the last 4 weeks my family and I have been trying to eat a more plant based diet. For the last few months I reduced the amount of meat I eat as a part of my journey to help my PCOS (Polycystic Ovaries Syndrome). But since watching more programmes like 'What the Health' and reading more articles about the damage that excessive meat and dairy consumption can do the human body we decided as a family to give up meat and reduce dairy intake for at least 2 weeks. And somehow those initial 2 weeks has now stretched to 4 weeks with some bumps along the way (the school barbecue being one of them!). I have also been inspired at which members of my family have taken on the challenge which certainly helps when you have spent 30 minutes chopping vegetables (my least favourite part of cooking!)

If you have young kids who are used to eating meat and dairy, this is difficult switch to make. Ok way more than difficult in the face of a determined 3-6 year old or even a stubborn teenager. But it can be done!

The thought that I would be helping my children's future health by reducing the risks of heart disease, inflammatory diseases and a possibly a whole host of other issues was a good motivator to at least give it a try. I am not advocating giving up meat and dairy altogether and going cold turkey. That is not for everyone and I don't think it is for all of my family. But we can make small changes in the family routine so that you eat more vegan or vegetarian dishes for most of the week with meat dishes and dairy foods as a treat once or twice a week. Its a huge reduction if you are used to eating meat and dairy every single day but your taste-buds become used to it and your body adjusts (for the better). Its about changing habits isn't it. What we eat and how often we eat are really formed through habit. Changing a habit to form another habit is not an easy task but it is possible and knowing that there is an entire community of vegan and vegetarian families to get advice definitely helps

With this in mind I'd like to share this easy couscous dish I've discovered and adapted for my family which can either be eaten on its own or served with baked sweet potato or roasted half butternut squash.

Easy Vegetable Couscous

Ingredients
1 red onion
500g couscous
1 cube vegetable stock
handful of pistachio nuts (optional)
3/4 ready roasted red peppers (you can buy these in jars)
2/3 ready sun-dried tomatoes (also available in jar)
handful of fresh mint
1 large aubergine (eggplant)
1 large or 2 small courgettes

To serve with
Sweet potato or roasted half butter nut squash (optional)

glass of wine (optional) 😏

Method
Put your sweet potatoes or half butternut squash (no need to peel) in the oven at 200/180 degrees (for fan asssisted ovens) for 40mins

Next, slice and roast the aubergine and courgette under the grill for 20 mins. While that is roasting. Chop the red onion and mint and put to one side. Then chop up the ready roasted peppers and sun-dried tomatoes and put in a separate bowl. This will be added to the roasting aubergines once finished and returned to the oven to warm through. In the meantime, boil a kettle and add the vegetable stock to 1ltr of boiling water. Stir until dissolved and then add the couscous and cover for around 10 mins or until all the couscous is soaked through. Fluff the couscous with a fork. Remove the roasted ingredients from the oven and mix in the couscous and the chopped red onion and mint. Add chopped pistachio nuts for crunch if you wish.

Pour yourself a well earned glass of wine for all that hard work and serve with the baked sweet potato or roasted half butternut squash.

Happy Healthy Eating!

Carving out 'Me' Time

When you become a parent suddenly time is no longer your your own. It starts from day one when you are desperate for that long soak in the tub but junior or princess has other ideas so end up taking them into the bathroom with you so you can at least not smell.  Going to the toilet becomes a joint adventure! You brush your teeth in 30 secs instead of the 3 minutes you are supposed to take. You brush your hands through your hair or end up putting your hair in braids so you don't look like a mad monster. Of course time in the bathroom to make ourselves look half decent increases as the kids get older and we get into the parenthood stride. But we still don't take time for ourselves just to recharge.

Why don't we do this? Its a guilt thing! Well definitely a guilt thing for me. I do the washing, the cleaning, the dusting, the clearing out, the grouting of the bathroom in order to avoid the guilt of actually taking some time for myself. You probably do the same or know someone that does the same.

Its a strange concept for us parents 'me' time. For some people 'me' time is a full blown weekend away or an entire day away from the pressures of life. But actually if we re-frame the way we think about 'me' time, it can be that 1hr journey into or from work with a good book or a journal; that 10 minutes with a warming drink before we have to pick up the kids; that 20 minute walk to the school gate on a nice day where we just take time to look around us and try to notice something different; that 5 minutes in the bathroom when you are doing your make up. Just taking a moment to stop and take a few deep breaths, that can be 'me' time.

Basically 'me' time can be anything you want it to be. So maybe we should all start to treasure the 15 minute, 10 minute or even 5 minute break that you might get in the day to just 'breathe'. We could think of it as stepping stone to getting that afternoon off or that weekend away. Perhaps practicing with smaller bits of time will lead to greater satisfaction when we do get those bigger bits of time.

Practice makes perfect right? 

Am off the practice some 'me' time. 

Thanks for sharing your 'me' time with me...

Can my street food obsession make my kids fat?

Can my street food obsession make my kids fat?

I love street food. The different tastes and smells all in one place is heaven. Maybe it's something to do with the fact that I did not have to slave over the cooker to make this wonderful food that is passing through my lips. Really can't put that down to being a mum but it is a big factor!

So you can imagine my shock to read an article recently proposing the idea that our love street food and street 'junk' food in particular is actually making us fat. The article pointed fingers at that organic hotdog on brioche bread with lashings of onion,chillies and sauce (A favourite for my kids!); the double lamb burger again with brioche buns and slaw (that only seems to taste amazing outside of the house); the sweet potato fries with garlic mayo on the side or 'homemade' ketchup.
Yes these are all favourite street food, farmer's market, and food festival favourites not just for adults for also for kids.

Large Chocolate Churro

Deluxe Hotdog made with Bratwurst Sausages in French Bread

The article made the point that unless food is made from scratch at home, we have no control over the salt, sugar or fat that is used to make that hotdog, burger or pork bun. Therefore, we could and are in most cases eating twice if not three times the amount of calories in one meal than for the same thing made at home. It does concede that the quality of the street/festival/farmer's market 'junk' food is probably excellent. Which is why a lot of us enjoy eating it so much. The main thing to remember I guess is that a treat is a treat and therefore if you have a treat, it should be just that. A once in a few weeks event and not a regular habit. I guess we all need to be conscious of what and how much we eat.

I still maintain that going to farmer's markets/street food festivals is a great way to introduce kids to different food tastes. But I suppose the trick with kids and to a certain extent with ourselves when attending these events is timing. It is probably better to go around lunch time or late afternoon so that the hotdog becomes lunch or that burger becomes an early dinner instead of the snack in between lunch and dinner. That's one way to keep down the calorie count!

In the meantime we can practice that new habit with these upcoming Festivals
Star of Bethnal Green Party Street Party 2017

londonfoodmonth.co.uk

Lunch anyone?

Child Friendly London Foodie Day Out

Child Friendly London Foodie Day Out.

I love food. I love trying new recipes and tasting new things. However due to my allergies, some things have become unavailable to me but that hasn't dampened my enthusiasm for good food, especially street food. The reason I and others like me enjoy this type of food so much is probably because it is not pretentious. It simply is good food, cooked with love to give pleasure to others. Ok so that's the romantic view but there is no denying that most street food is simply good food at a good price.

Plus I have discovered that the benefits of street food go beyond my own palette. It is also an inexpensive relaxed way of introducing children to new food flavours without having to slave over it in the kitchen only to have them turn around and spit it out. Have you ever been in a situation where your kids will eat one thing at a friend's house but refuse to eat it at yours? They suddenly profess to hate the very dish that you prepare in exactly the same way as their friend's mum or your friend does but will eat it the very next play date with such gusto that anyone would think you were starving them at home. It's one of those 'Really?' (parent looking at child disbelievingly) moments.

As a lover of food it is gut twisting when the kids don't want to try something you have lovingly prepared so I have found that introducing them to street food is a good way of getting them to appreciate food without the emotional heartache of home food rejection. Fortunately London has some exceptional places to do this. I do feel lucky and privileged to live in a city that plays host to places like Pop Brixton (a food. drink and work collective in South London), Borough Market, Greenwich Market and BoxPark in Shoreditch . All great places to get a taste of different things but still eat at the same table. You know what I mean - its the old one child wants pizza but the other one wants a burger and you want Japanese for lunch scenario. Getting street food in these places means that you all have what you want whilst tasting what the other person gets, sit at the same table and still be under £20 for a good meal for four. Its pushing about £30 for a meal for six people but still half the cost of eating even at medium price eateries such as Pizza Express or Nandos with six at the table. Pocket friendly non junk food eating definitely gets my vote!

Mama Jerk @ PopBrixton 

If you go to somewhere like PopBrixton you would then just need to cross the road to The Chocolate Museum and make your own chocolate for desert.

Chocolate Lolly making 

Great way to finish off a foodie afternoon.

Would you agree?

Stress Free London Easter

Stress Free London Easter

Easter in London with kids can be super expensive. It is not so much the cost of getting into to places. The majority of museums in London especially the major ones are all free. It is mainly the cost of feeding the little ones once out in Central London or near it that really empties the pockets. The gift shop is another money eater but really that part might be my issue as I'm a bit partial to a gift shop purchase. Something to do with the 'memory' of the event I guess.

With this in mind and determined to make this easter as stress free and pocket friendly as possible, I have put together some ideas to survive the easter holidays with both my mind and my wallet in tact.

Hope this is helpful to you also if you live here and are new to London or are planning to visit anytime soon.

As I mentioned, one of the major spends whilst exploring London is on food. However, there are cheaper alternatives (NOT just McDonalds) if you are prepared to seek them out. Lifestyle magazine The Londonist have a great list of cheap eats near the main museums here. And of course Google Maps extra service  which shows you what's nearby is also a good way to eat out on a budget. If the weather is good it's a good idea to pack a packed lunch for the day and simply come out of the museum and eat in the local squares and gardens which are dotted near every single major museum. Some museums such as the The Horniman Museum and Gardens have such beautiful gardens attached it would be a shame to not sit with a picnic and enjoy the views on a nice day.

Picture of a part of Horniman Museum Gardens

If you plan carefully that usual £100 day out could be just £20 or less. Great for buying that new bag/outfit/garden furniture you've had your eye on. Oops sorry the garden furniture bit is just me. ☺.
As I was saying... it is a saving! Who doesn't want to save cash and still have a great experience?

London is not just about 'culture' there are so many local parks and woods especially in south London that make for a good time. If you don't live south, phone a friend or find a friend that lives that side of the river because the parking alone will save you a fortune with the exception of areas such as Putney and Battersea; but you always get the awkward ones right? A few of the bigger parks will sometimes host Easter trails for the younger kids which you can pick up at the park information hut for free or sometimes for a small contribution so it is worth having a go if you want to get the little ones excited before you find your 'I'm not getting up from here' spot in the park. And of course before you head out throw a ball, frisbee, book or even bubbles for the little ones in a bag so they can keep themselves amused for that twenty minute interval when you've found your 'spot' and you just want to sit down.  Of course it does help to meet up with friends and family if possible to make that rest interval last longer.

For those inside days (yes, you definitely need a plan for the inside day thanks to the English weather), movie marathon, dance competition, charades, a few 'Simon says' games are all great inexpensive options even if you are stuck in the hotel. I did come across a 3 in a row game made with a marker, some tape and disposable plates that looked like a good hotel option but haven't tried it yet personally. If you do try this do let me know.

Easter is also a great time to teach some cooking skills and at the same time remind or re-introduce your family to some of the traditional food that is eaten mainly at easter. No - Not just chocolate Easter Eggs but things like Jamaican Bun and Cheese, Hot Cross Buns, Hard Boiled Eggs dyed Red to symbolize the blood of Christ (a tradition in Greece), Paska (Russian Sweet Bread) and too many others to name. This is a great inexpensive one for those with pre-teens. Lets be honest not everyone can afford regular Jump Giants (indoor trampolining) trips or clothes shopping trips at Westfield. Although to keep this particular activity stress free might require patience on the part of the adult and a 'I will not take over!' mantra on repeat in one's head, but still a great memory to make even if you burn the food. Pizza anyone???

Have a stress free easter folks!

Mummy's Job....according to my six year old

Mummy's Job....according to my six year old.

I had an interesting conversation with my six year old daughter on the walk to school this morning. Whilst avoiding the dog poo on the pavement, (we live near a park with some irresponsible dog owners) she came out with this statement. Quite random but I've come to expect this from my six year old. So this is how the conversation went.

Six  year old - 'Mummy, you have three jobs!'
Me              - 'I do?'
Six year old  - 'Yeah...you have to be a mum, a 'rememberer' and a mum that has to go to a job to get money'
Me             - 'Aaah ok!'

Quite satisfied with laying that little nugget of wisdom, we then proceeded to play I spy the rest of the way.

Usually these conversations might get put to the back of the brain and maybe recalled for future reference but this one stayed with me all day. It just made me smile. To think a six year can be so in tune that they can essentially sum up what most of us mums do everyday.

We do have 3 jobs. We have a multitude of jobs. We are mothers and of course that includes everything from cooking and cleaning to playmate and nurse/doctor.

But we are also 'rememberers' as my daughter phrased it. What is interesting is that my daughter chose to see this as a separate part of being a mum. I asked her later what she meant by 'rememberers' and she explained that I am the one she turns to share the memories that she has of different events that we have done together as well as the one who remembers what days friends are coming over or she going to them. Quite simple right? Her view was interesting as my first thought at hearing  the word 'rememberers' was that I was the unpaid family secretary and organiser, which I am not denying that I am. But for my six year old and probably for the other young children, our job as parents is to facilitate the creation memories for them. Whether that be getting together with family or going to explore a new park, museum exhibit or play area. Or even just walking to school playing eye spy. Its all about creating positive memories throughout childhood that ultimately will sustain you as an adult, especially through difficult times.

Creating memories in the park

Thing is you don't have to be a mother to be a 'rememberer' because the fact is as girls we are just raised to be the one that remembers the birthdays, the christenings, and every other special event in the lives of family and friends. Aunties, Girlfriends, Sister in laws, Grandmothers are all 'rememberers' and together we help sustain the character of the next generation.

A pretty positive thought on International Women's Day and a good way to take one into Women's History Month March 2017.



Would you agree?

Birthday party 101!

Birthday party 101!

Last year I had a Birthday celebration for my 11 year old. It was a simple gathering. Her and a few of her friends went to a climbing lesson at the local sports centre and then came back to our house for pizza. It was 6 children in all as this was the booking I could get with the sports centre for a day close to my daughter's actual birthday. Now here is where it got tricky!

Who do you invite?

I left it to my daughter to chose the 5 other boys and girls that would join her. Which of course meant that some of her friends didn't get an invite. There was no malicious intent it was simply a question of numbers. However, it is this question of numbers that can really get a parent into trouble. Especially with other parents who feel that their child should have been one of the 5 children and so decide to take out their frustration by avoiding you at all possible costs. But at least they didn't say 'cash me outside!' ☺. I'm not about that life!

The reaction I thought was a little bit over the top. But looking at comments on Mums website NetMums the responses were quite mixed and led me to think of this 101! guide for Birthday parties; which I feel maybe should be given to every parent alongside their starting school pack just to remind them that a 'non-invite' does not mean your child is not liked. Nursery/Primary school age seems to be the time when this situation is likely to occur the most. By the time they get to Secondary school we don't know half their friends and our kids tend to (THANKFULLY) selectively invite people to more small events like paint-balling or cinema anyway.

I'm not an expert by any stretch of the imagination (in particular my crazy imagination). This guide is just a suggestion for those like myself to refer back to when faced with this dilemma.

It's just a suggestion!

Everyone has feelings and of course it is only natural for parents to be protective of their children. But if with every party 'non-invite' we pass on the idea to our children that not being invited to something will always mean that you are not liked; we could be setting them up to have a pretty pessimistic view of life. We all need to the skill of Resilience in life to deal with adversity. For example I could only get 3 likes for my profile pic on Facebook but I still know I am beautiful!

Seriously though..do you really want your child to go through life being the 'people pleaser', the ' one who always says yes' because they don't have the confidence to say no? The one person that always gets taken advantage of. Do you want them to be the type of person that only values the 'superficial' over the 'real' in life or even worse not be able to distinguish between the two?  What did you say? - You do! Stop reading now! For those of you who don't want this path for children thanks for sticking with this post so far.

Resilience is an important life skill. Well it must be... why else do teachers and education experts keep talking about it? Resilience_in_schools_health_inequalities Report 2014. It is definitely a skill some of us as parents were never taught in school or at home and so had to learn the hard way. So where better to start teaching this skill to our kids than with the inevitable 'non party invite' situation.

It's just a thought!

Black Girl's PCOS - Challenge Accepted! ....21 days in

Black Girl's PCOS - Challenge Accepted! .....21 days in

So this is an update on my PCOS lose weight, reduce sugar diet where the goal is to lose 5% of my body weight.

And 21 days in....it has definitely been interesting! A whirlwind of ideas in fact!
For the last 21 days I have been eating fresh fruit and vegetables only....NOT. I've not lost the plot don't worry. I've always been told that man cannot live by VEG alone! And this WO(man) certainly can't. Not after 40 years of meat & fish passing my lips. Plus this challenge is not about drastic measures.

Therefore in the interest of doing this without using extreme measures (like deliberately starving oneself) I have decided to follow 2 diets that seem to meet the recommendations of all those medical websites I've trawled through prior to embarking on my challenge. I've chosen to test the Whole 30 lifestyle and the Alkaline Diet. The 2 diets have been split over 6 weeks to see which one A)Works best at shifting those stubborn pounds and B) actually makes me feel more energized and not deprived.

In theory both diets should do the same thing but the key to staying with something is (I've found) feeling good about it. For example we all join the gym with the intention of going regularly but soon those regular visits get shunted in favour of drinks after work, shopping with girlfriends, lazing on the sofa to get through the boxset that everyone is talking about before it becomes yesterday's thing. You get the drift...

So the challenge is to eat whole unprocessed food and specific alkaline heavy food while still feeding my kids the same food they have gotten used to before this PCOS challenge started. I have thought about swapping everyone over to the new eating regime but unlike some mums I have to have my arsenal ready tested before going into to battle, so if this works their time will come.

So far the whole 30 lifestyle has been relatively easy to do. I don't eat much junk food anyway so it has been all about picking the options that suit the lifestyle. Basically I swap stuff or I just leave things off my plate. So in effect I cook one meal for everyone but leave out the item that doesn't suit the whole 30 theory 

Below is an example of the dinner swaps I have done in order to accommodate the first part of these new eating choices. The family might have chicken with rice and peas for Sunday dinner but I'll have just the chicken with fresh salad or couscous. I still get the protein but less of the carbohydrates. 

So as you can see from my sample menu, I swap the heavy carbohydrates when I can. The results so far have been promising. I have lost around 9 pounds since starting 21 days ago and therefore I am on target. 

My only vice is that glass of red wine that calls to me at least twice a week but I think without this treat I would feel super deprived. However as it is, the Whole 30 lifestyle has been pretty manageable. 

We shall see if the next 21 days of eating Alkaline can beat Whole 30. 

See you soon folks 

❤👌✌

Black Girl's PCOS Challenge - (Accepted)!

Black Girl's PCOS Challenge - (Accepted!).

Didn't know there was such a thing? Well allow me to enlighten you. It is actually Polycystic Ovary Syndrome or PCOS for short. That is the hormonal imbalance that has plagued this black girl for the last few years.

And it all came out (so to speak) when I simply couldn't understand why I could not last longer than an hour or so between visits to the loo.  It did feel like I had turned into a fountain and someone else was turning me on and off. Crazy right? Probably not crazy for some of you who have already had kids.  So anyway back to my point. I decided to have this 'irregular' toilet use investigated and you know that saying 'don't open a can of worms'. Yes I opened a can of worms. And this worm happens to Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. Won't bore you with the specifics like how it gets diagnosed or treatment options. If you are intelligent enough to be reading this blog, you can Google it.

One of the things that have an impact on this condition is being overweight. So this year I have decided to make a concerted effort to lose weight to help me to cope with the excess hair (not growing on my head), the extended menstrual bleeds, tiredness and other niggles that may or may not be linked to PCOS but will probably benefit from some weight loss too. Apart from the emotional distress there is some financial distress from having PCOS. I mean at the rate I'm going hair removal cream, threading treatments, pads and tampons will soon bankrupt me!! Well maybe not as dramatic as that but one can hardly think of buying that sexy skin tight pair of jeans when she's got big pads stuck in her pants from yet another unexpected visit from mother nature!!

So on the 1st week of the year, the challenge has begun to reduce my PCOS symptoms so life can really be enjoyed to the full.

My goal is to lose at least 20 pounds which will meet the 5% recommended weight loss I have been reading on every medical site imaginable (or at least the ones loaded onto the Internet).

Decided to ditch the carbs and sugar or well drastically reduce them and not eat past 6pm. Might have the odd glass of wine, after all woman cannot live on carrot sticks alone. Can she??? or rather Why should she??? I will also aim to exercise more by walking and yoga. This is kind of an experiment which I hope will work as the light skin with dark facial hair (ie the beard) look and the 2 week menstrual bleeds have definitely lost their novelty factor.

My current comfort is knowing that every other 40 something woman is probably also on a diet this week if not this month so at least I'm not the odd one out with the basket full of veg at the supermarket. It'll be the guy over there with the 7 pack of chocolate bars and cola. Mmmm....Chocolate........

Ooops sorry daydreaming there for a minute.

Would love to hear any tips from those of you who have had PCOS and gone on a weight loss journey to control your symptoms.

Wish me luck!!

Follow my journey.

S.A.S syndrome

S.A.S Syndrome

I am a parent and I am suffering from S.A.S SYNDROME. Thats School application stress (S.A.S) for all United Kingdom residents.

This is the right school for you Primary 

Sorry, just had to get that confession out there....

So for those of you who don't live in the UK or whose kids are still under four, allow me to explain this phenomenon which has only really cropped up over the last decade or so. This is because of the perception that most comprehensive schools are rubbish and grammar school or church school is the best. This is a whole different subject so I'll cover that in another post. For now am just looking at S.A.S.

In the U.K. every October thousands of parents have to go through the process of applying for Primary, Secondary or Tertiary places for their offspring. This process is now done online through a centralized computer system that supposedly matches the applicant to the school with a place out of their six available choices for primary and secondary education and five choices for tertiary education. Sounds simple right? Definitely not simple!

Its a process rigged with catches where you as the parent start to panic about everything from not living next to a 'good' school to not choosing the right university course for that teenager who is about the embark on one of the most important periods in their lives. The process is designed to encourage self doubt. Even the application list for primary and secondary school encourages self doubt with its preference rating for schools. The idea is that you list the schools in your application according to the one you like the most down to the one you like the least. I mean you look at the list and start to wonder if you should put the the school you really really want but don't actually live next to first. Or should you be practical and put the school you actually live next to but hate with a passion because the kids at the chip shop after school do nothing but scream like banshees and shout like gorillas being let out their cages every afternoon at 3.30pm. I mean talk about pitching the "practical parent" against the "aspiring parent" or the "I'm too hippy/pally with my kids to be a parent to actually parent so i'll let you choose schools" against the "you will do what I tell you at all times and I don't care if you hate the look of the school or don't want to go to the same school as your older sibling parent". It's a conspiracy against parents!!! OK, maybe not but it can feel like it sometimes.

For those of us who can't try to rig the process by moving house to get into that sought after primary school or secondary school (Yes this does happen, and is quite common!); October is the probably the most stress filled month of the year before Xmas. It even beats the School summer holiday for stress levels. At least the sun is shining during the summer (well kind of !). Summer months are definitely warmer so this makes it all seem a bit easier to handle. In fact here's an idea. Why don't we have this school application process during the first week of the summer holidays. Lower stress levels as the sunshine keeps people smiling. It's the most expensive air fare week of the entire year so most of us can't afford to jump on a plane anyway which means loads of people are around for school visits. Yes lets do that.

Maybe someone will start a campaign.

PLEASE.... someone start a campaign. I am too busy dealing with my S.A.S.

Am going to do some yoga now for S.A.S relief

Until the next post!

Ditch the back to school guilt

Back to School Guilt 

As this post is being written most of you with kids will have just completed your first week back to school. And what a week that was! Catching up on school friends news and school news. Finding out who did what during the holidays and what's new at school is now lodged in the back of many a parent's brain to be stored and called upon as needed. 

As we enter the 2nd full week of the school return, my mind turns to those that are starting primary and secondary school this year and those that are ending their primary and secondary experiences. I look at the mum and dads dropping off their 4 and 5 year olds to their respective reception classes, the strained look on some faces as they encourage their little people to head into the classroom and it makes me ask the question - Why do we feel so guilty that first time dropping our kids to school? 

Is it seeing that little person looking so formal in their brand spanking new uniform (even if they are now big 11 year olds) something that automatically makes us suddenly reflect on life and what's next for our offspring? The questions that churn in the parent mind  such as what will they encounter in that big classroom today (without us)? Will they like what's on offer for lunch (a lunch we didn't provide)? Will they remember to wash their hands after using the bathroom (because we are not there to remind them and most of our kids are just nasty right)? Even when they get to secondary school and are perfectly capable young people we still feel guilty for not dropping them at the school gate, not being in the classroom to help fend off the bullies (because it goes without thought that all classes have bullies), not being there to guide them to all these classes they are expected to find their way to after only 2 weeks in this new school. So many many thoughts run through the parents head that the stress then builds up. 

The guilt is inevitable but the guilt is destructive. Destructive for both the parent and the child. Children are at an advantage. They have no such guilt and therefore none of that additional unnecessary stress which ultimately means that they just get on with their day. Guilt free! Yes Guilt Free! 

So with that in mind I have a few suggestions to stay that guilt free (kick them out of the car at the school gate or as close as possible to it) type of parent in first weeks of new to school. 

Here are a few signs that your child is happy to go to school (because even us experienced parents have to be reminded sometimes). 

1. Walking off into the classroom before you have the chance to form the words 'Bye Bye' leaving you hanging man! - Hint: A Happy child!
2. Running towards the school gate, leaving you dragging your ass behind at slow poke pace because A. you had one glass too many last night or B. you have the prospect of a desk and no daylight for the next 8 hours waiting for you or C. both option A. and B. combined with the ridiculous annoying colleague who always wants to disrupt your day with their inane chat about not finding the right shoes! (torture) - Hint: That's a happy kid!
3. Telling you that you can go once they reach the top of the road and you are nowhere near the school gate hence less opportunity for you to cramp their style - Hint: Very HAPPY kid! 
4. Telling you that they will be late because they have joined the Gymnastics Club, Football Club, IT Club, Chess Club, Debating Group, Netball Club and any other club that they could find to throw into the mix just because they have their own door key now club! 

See what I did there? 

Happy Kids, Happy Kids, Happy Kids 

So stop worrying

Take a deep breath 

Pat yourself on the back 

and let your kids get on with their day. 

YOU ARE DOING A GREAT JOB!!!!! 

School Summer Holiday Mania

School Summer Holiday Mania

And so it begins... 6 weeks of kids being on school holiday and 6 weeks of deeply disturbed working and stay at home parents trundling around England trying to stay sane in the case of parents and trying to have adventures in the case of the kids.

As a freelancer I am not obligated to be in an office unless under contract (or to put it crudely - tied to a desk ) unless I choose to do so and this summer I am taking a summer break. My contract ended just before the summer and it just made sense just to tighten the belt and not stress for a month about how I would meet the latest deadline and keep my (very active) kids happy for summer. But I've been lucky to have that option this year. A lot of parents (including other freelancers) will not have this option so I am definitely not complaining but it has given me some time to reflect about the summer holidays.

Summer means so many things to so many people for all sorts of reasons and with all sorts backgrounds.
I am writing about it from a western middle income perspective and so the issues below are so totally first world issues so do forgive me if a lot of what you read next will simply turn your stomach!

On that note, lets start with the little people. When you are a toddler Summer just means you don't have to wear that stuffy coat your parent keeps stuffing you into before allowing you to go out the door (and thats just the nice expensive in some cases denim premium jacket!). When you are a early years primary school goer aged 5-8yrs, its a magical time to go into the garden or the park and be able to run free to be a pirate or princess in world you create.... ok so i let my nostalgia run away a bit.... its more time on the tablet you got for Christmas! When your 9-11yrs its a time to be out with your friends all day every day (if you have a parent at home) or a time to learn new skills and hate every minute at computer clubs or French club (if you're lucky). And when your in secondary school its pretty much the same as the last statement until you turn 16 at which time of course you just hang out at your friend's houses or your house watching TV, chatting, playing the X-Box or Playstation or whatever consoles happen to be in vogue. In my day (showing my age) it was Nintendo. So essentially for little people summer is freedom from school and in some cases watchful interfering eyes (am thinking of the boys that I have been told have recently discovered free-climbing here).

Summer Holidays for the parent on the other hand is a whole different ball game. Its is not a HOLIDAY!. I repeat it is NOT a HOLIDAY!. It's more like a CON ME DAY for 6 whole weeks. So by this I mean we get CONNED by the airlines and travel companies and hoteliers who charge us 50% more to take a family break. We get CONNED by the activity companies who charge a whole week's wages so we can have the pseudo satisfaction that our sprogs will be at least 'entertained' while we go to work. We get CONNED by our own offspring who repeatedly ask for money for ICE CREAM. Why do you need ice cream in 17 degree heat (and i use the word heat loosely) anyway? Do you see my point - Summer school holidays for parents can feel like Punishment.

But then there are those special moments.. You know the ones... don't pretend like you don't know what i'm talking about. Yes! the moment when little johnny/jane or big johnny/jane discovers something new and exciting (world changing even) on that rare family day out.  That day the 10year old got to go to the shop all by themselves because you now have it your brain that its safer now the summer is here. That day everyone remembers when no-one argued and there was plenty of laughing. That day you turned into a kid again and chased everyone around with the garden hose or allowed yourself to be buried in the sand hoping they wont leave you there until the tide comes in. That day when you get that hug and a whispered 'Thank you' for the ice cream or the game in the park. The sun, the twitter of nature, that warm but safe feeling and all the countless days when you really see the Joy in Summer School Holidays.

That's First world middle income Summer Mania...Maybe not such a bad 'problem' to have after all!!

Journey to an organised house

It started around Xmas... that nagging thing of wanting to get organised, wanting a new kitchen (ok this bit started a few years ago) and wanting to have everything in the house with its own place to be. Basically I was fed up of clutter.

Although my house has never been a complete mess, there were always a few things that never got round to getting sorted. For example the Kitchen cupboards. A total meca to disorganised life. Pots and pans chucked in, glasses and cups in one bit, plates in another (no order here except for size) and food and spices chucked in where one could find space.

It always felt as if there wasn't enough cupboard space for anything. Without realising it this was slowly getting worse and suddenly it got on my last nerve just after xmas. You know the days in between xmas and new year - the 'dead days'. Where you don't really know what to do with yourself as you're stuffed from xmas and partied out but you don't want to spend too much money before New Year. Yes, I'm sure you recognise this state of suspension especially if you have got to my age (kids or no kids).

So what do I do. Start taking out everything from the cupboards of course. One big bin bag later, a trip to the pound shop for some cheap baskets (no one will see or care that these are storing my kitchen bits!) and I finally have a kitchen that didn't feel small. Instead it became functional. Put stuff in the basket and slide pull the basket out when you need something. I also used food plastic containers from the take aways we have had. You do need to thoroughly wash these first though but because it's clear plastic you can see in a instant what spices you have and pull out the box you need. The restricted space of an open container also forces you to store things neatly.

Sounds so simple  Took me ten years but hey everyone has to work at their own pace right?

Now for a brighter kitchen.... cue the spray paint.

Read about how this

was transformed into this

without the pain of picking up a paintbrush myself.